Slowing to See

I breeze by my son's classroom on the way back to my office- and am stopped in my tracks... fiery crimson petals act like a stoplight to my soul... I must pause and take it in. Appreciate the way the raindrops catch the morning light. The contrast of colors.

I've said it before, but living in Uganda is like living in technicolor. Everything is vibrant and intense- the colors, the scents, the cultural differences, the people (so very friendly, welcoming, and enthusiastic), even the weather (though pretty much perfect year round) is an intense contrast of just two seasons: rainy or dry. And I have a choice. I can allow the harsh contrasts to assault my vision- or I can stop and just appreciate it for what it is. No judgement.

This flower is audacious in it's beauty. And that's just what I love about it. I am not a fan of the color red- and I could have just kept walking... because its not my own personal concept of beautiful... but I slowed to see it for what it is. A canvas for the wild, audacious glory of God.

And I was challenged in that moment- how often do I rush by another person without slowing to see the fingerprints of God on their souls?? Do I just see the things that make them different from me? Do I simply dismiss them as "other"? Or do I see "child of God"... my sister or brother?

It just takes one moment of a day for your world to get rocked. One second to pause and really see.

I want to be a woman who truly sees. Someone who's gaze isn't always on my phone, who's agenda isn't the next item on my to do list, who's got enough margin in her day to stop and actually ask how you're doing, and listen for the answer- to really see you.

When we bump up against our limits

Pouring out:
Serving communion at
Elementary School
Spiritual Emphasis Week

On Wednesday I preached at Middle and High School chapels about abiding... about how much power and freedom there is when we abide... about the beauty and the peace that come when we stop striving and rest in what He has already accomplished {which is everything}... and then there was Thursday.

I've come to realize I'm not a short fuse person- I have a very long fuse... however, once you reach the end: look out. I can be patient and obliging for a long time. I have heaps of grace and appreciation for this very different culture I live in. Until I don't. When I just want my babies to see the doctor {at the time they told me to come in} or get their cavity filled or have a date lunch with my husband and everything conspires against me. Or so it feels. I know this is a bit dramatic. But yesterday it felt dramatic.

Our weekly routine has shifted now that I'm working part-time at our kids' school. And I am around more people more often than I was our last term. And I feel the need to be much more intentional with my kids when I am home. These realities may be slowly draining my very friendly, introverted self.

And yet. He is keeping me... when I let Him. There are days when you know much will be demanded of you- when you are pouring and pouring- and you take the time you need for Him to fill you. But then there are days like Thursday when things don't seem like a big deal, and then the little one is up at 4:59am, and you just don't get that time. And all morning you find yourself bumping up against your humanity and your self and your limits. Empty.

It's not pretty. But the discovery of who I am when left to my own devices throws me on His grace. Seeing my self in all its selfish, impatient, angry blaze humbles me. And John 15 comes flooding back like conviction and hope mixed together: "apart from Me you can do nothing" {John 15:5} which then means "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength."{Philippians 4:13}.

Studying the Enneagram, we can "learn how to recognize and dis-identify with the parts of our personalities that limit us so we can be reunited with our truest and best selves, that 'pure diamond, blazing with the invisible light of heaven,' as Thomas Merton said.

That's the blaze I want glowing within me. And I can only get there when I abide in Him, and allow Him to shine His light on those broken and fallen places within me.

linking up today at the Grove @Velvet Ashes:

#tbt Scariest Moment...

**We are at World Gospel Mission Headquarters this week for debriefing and re-entry.  It's a time for returning missionaries to reflect on their term, and look for the hand of God, as they prepare for Homeland Ministry Assignment.  Since it is throwback thursday (#tbt), I figured I would share this post from our first term, which has come up in our reflection process today as the scariest moment of our first two years.**

April 19, 2012
It was one of those scary, exhausting nights- getting out of bed at 2am because Seth was having an asthma attack.  on retreat.  in a town we were unfamiliar with.  He was barking and wheezing, unable to breathe deep.  His finger nails were getting a bluish tint.  We had to get him to a hospital.  Would there be a hospital?  The night guard heard our commotion- Seth sounded bad.  And he brought the night manager.  As soon as he saw Seth he said, let's get in your vehicle.  I'll take you to the hospital.  TIA #1- this man coming with us to the hospital in the middle of the night.

At the hospital they got an IV in Seth on the first try- amazing.  Love gift from Jesus.  And after three medicines, moved us from Triage to a private room.  They were admitting us.  Sweet mama nurse kept praying and saying "God is good.  God is kind. You are a good boy".  Such an encouragement.  TIA #2- the faith and strength of this older Ugandan woman. 

Josh left to get some rest while I "slept" in bed with Seth.  When he called later to see what I needed him to bring, I said- a thermos of chai.  I need sugar and caffeine.  The hotel did not have any small thermoses.  But the restaurant coordinator, Honest, whom I had been working with, sent me chai in her own personal travel mug.  TIA #3- chai sent in her own mug- such generosity of spirit.

I love this country and her people.  Seth is doing fine now- thank you for your prayers that crazy night and day.  God hears and answers!

**edited and reposted from the archives

By the Numbers: Our First Term

in which we recount {literally} some fond memories and astounding facts about our first term in Uganda:

first day of school: August 2011

• ___?__: the number kilometers we've put on our little Rav4, Wompus, since May 2011
• 2: the number of accidents that tough Rav4 has been in this term.
• countless: the times Jesus has protected us on the road.
• 4, 600 feet: the altitude of our house above sea level

Sunset from our back door

• 7am-7pm: the time the sun rises and sets every.day.of.the.year. in Kampala
• 1,000,000: the number of times we've told Siddeley, our puppy, "no" or "down" or "out" since he arrived in May 2012
• 4: the largest number of ATMs in one day, in failed attempts to withdraw money.

University Ladies Sleepover: March 2012

• 45: the number of women at our house for a "sleepover"
• 75: the number of minutes it took for all my university small group ladies to show up last Tuesday

Sword Drill at Heritage International School

• 27: the number of nationalities represented at Heritage International School
• 5: the number of student testimonies in chapel at Heritage this year {related- 0: the number of student testimonies last year}!  God is on the move!

Our guest, Randy Goodgame, teaching the ukelele

• 291: the number of nights we've had house guests {yes, that's 40% of our first term}
• 37: the number of times Seth has called our guests "customers"...
• 945: the number of coffee pots we've brewed. {one a day, and occasionally two}

Our own baseball team!

• 10: the largest number of children living on this compound at one time {Coppedges, Rambos, and Hallahans}
• 65: the number of days until Kelly and the boys get on a plane for America.
• 26: the number of days Kelly and the boys have to survive without Josh.
• 26: the number of days Kelly welcomes visitors and babysitters {just kidding, you can come babysit after Josh gets back} 
• innumerable: our thanks and love to you who love us, pray for us, support us, encourage us and read our blog! {and that goes double for those who comment on our blog}

So grateful!

TIA: A Great Quest

"...inconvenience, as I have said, is only one aspect, and that the most unimaginative and accidental aspect of a really romantic situation. An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered." -G.K. Chesterton

Descending down our rocky hill, braking just before the on-slaught of traffic.  I gently move into the flow, adding my contribution to the smog overhead.  I am on a quest.  One that often proves mundane, but today has me scouring the city.

I arrive at the ATM at our corner grocery story.  Another brave soul emerges- "Sorry, try again later." I resume my quest, battling traffic and dodging pedestrians at every turn.  ATM #2 "No money" says the woman sitting inside the booth, without even the customary greeting.  I reluctantly head to Heritage to get what little money Josh had {ATM #3}.  I decide to tempt fate and attempt ATM #4.  It cycles through... cycles through... I must have asked for too much money.  Receipt.  No money.  "Your account will be reimbursed." The ATMs have won.

I am the hunter.  Scouring shelves for cheapest price.  Whittling down my list to necessities.  I arrive home weary, yet satisfied.  I braved the world of grocery shopping in Kampala and survived.  today.

What inconvenience could you re-write as an adventure?  It's all about perspective. 

TIA: Thanksgiving is NOT a holiday here...

our thanksgiving decor

"For here we have no continuing city, but we seek the one to come. Therefore by Him let us continually offer the sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of our lips, giving thanks to His name. But do not forget to do good and to share, for with such sacrifices God is well pleased." -Hebrews 13:14-16

Thanksgiving.  People all over America will sit down to feasts of epic proportions tomorrow.  They will encircle the table, hold hands, and give thanks for the bounty they have received.  And we will wake up, and go to school just like every other day this week.  We don't celebrate Thanksgiving here. We live it.

Thanksgiving is an American holiday, and we live in a tropical, foreign country.  It has been h.o.t. here lately.  Sandals, a sun dress and sunglasses are my style these days.  It doesn't feel like Thanksgiving.  There are no pumpkin spice lattes.  Cranberry sauce is more $10 for less than 8oz.  The power goes out.  Our coffee pot decides to die.  The driver coming in the opposite direction likes my side of the road better, and doesn't mind that I have to practically fall off the road to get out of his way.   It's just hard to live here some days.  But the good news is- this isn't my home.  Actually, neither is America.

We are sojourners.  this world isn't my true home... Therefore, give thanks. Therefore, praise Him.  Therefore, set your eyes on things above, not on earthly things.  And don't forget to do good and to share...

We belong to A Continuing City.  And the only way to journey through this land well is to keep our eyes fixed on His face.  To give thanks daily, not just once a year.  If I truly want to live well, I must give thanks; it's my air supply on this foreign planet.  And so I fill up page after page- counting His gifts- trying to see His hand in each day.  If I don't, my gaze drifts to dirt and then my soul sinks to darkness.  So I keep counting; I keep giving thanks.

Because Thanksgiving is not just an American holiday.  It's my daily response to a good God who can be trusted. And if you need some help getting grateful today- check out this "Prayer for Overflowing with Thankfulness" and this post on "Generating Gratitude".    And this post from Ann Voskamp, When Thanksgiving is Hard.

TIA: This is Africa

This is Africa.  land of fiery sunsets.  and mosquitoes.

This is Africa.  land of city skyline in the background.  and goats in the foreground. 

beautiful dichotomy.

TIA: $2 Roses

What Happens When You Drop Your Cracker

{if you don't like bugs, scroll no further}  Apparently the new crackers I bought this week are delicious!  At least the ants think so! 

We are in the midst of a busy season- two weeks of Spiritual Emphasis at Heritage, and right in the middle of those two weeks, a field dinner and an all day Saturday field meeting.  Sometimes it seems like everything swarms and piles up at once!  Kinda like this....

Maybe ten minutes after snack time I found the ants having a feast. 

TIA: No Power

So, the power has been out all day (and may not be back soon since Josh saw the electric company workers at the bottom of our hill today, "The lines have rotted, we have to replace them").  Now this isn't the worst thing in the world, since it's daylight, I have a gas stove, we have battery back up...  the one thing that may get screwed up is our popsicle tradition :(  I'm hoping that since I haven't opened the freezer today, they will be ready for our daily after school celebration.  If not, we'll have to bust out the cheese curls I found at the grocery store this week (happy surprise).  So that's my day in Africa.  Working on my computer on battery back up, spending time with Jesus, tidying up the house for the team tonight, and awaiting my boys' return from school.

And hey, if the power stays out that means dinner by candlelight and flashlight tag (see video to experience the hilarity)! 

drippy, orange popsicles

i wake up in the mornings chilly.  it's like a breath of autumn for my fall-starved soul.  by noon i am stripping off my cardigan and reaching for some cold water.  welcome to the equator.  the clouds hang, ominous.  the rain pours.  and then ten minutes later the sun beams.

having grown up in the states, i tend to equate the school year with cool weather. not so here in good ol' Uganda.  so we've begun a new tradition that makes me smile every.single.day.  popsicles!  cold, tangy, refreshing popsicles.  my boys sit still and slurp up that tropical coldness, and i get to hear about their day at school.  it's a point of connection.  and one we won't have to trade in once winter arrives (fyi- it won't!).  i love it. 

sometimes you just have to institute a tradition and glory in the moment.  they won't sit and talk to me forever- but i'm going to create space where they can if they want to.  and if i must, i will bribe them with popsicles. 

TIA: New Beds

Some things are different and not as great in Uganda.  Other things are different and better in Uganda.  Today we're on the better end of the deal!  I saw a missionary post an ad for bunk beds on facebook and immediately fell in love with them.  They were rustic safari-style bunk beds, entirely covered in mosquito net.  So I got in touch with her and let her know of our interest. 

I knew the beds would not make it up our spiral staircase in one piece- so I asked if she could have them disassembled and re-assembled in the boys' room.  No problem!  The same man who made these beds, would come and assemble them in our house.  As usual it didn't happen on the first try.  They needed a bigger truck.  So, the neighbor across the street had a bigger truck!  Score!  Bed is on it's way.  Here it is.  In pieces:

Now to get those pieces up the steps!  I stood back and let them do their thing.  Meanwhile, I was praying for a miracle.  All the pieces fit!  Here they are assembling the bunks in our boys' room. 

It is just such a blessing to get hand-crafted furniture here. Delivered.  Assembled.  And it is another blessing to be a part of the missionary community here where people buy and sell their things and who help each other out. So blessed.  Very grateful today that we live in Uganda.  Tune in tomorrow for the final photo of the beds!

TIA: Driving Across the City

Cows are not that uncommon here.  Their horns are epic.  I still get amazed when I see them in the city.  Traffic Police are also not that uncommon here.  I still get a little nervous when I see them as I drive. 

The other day I was driving across to hang out with my friend Vanessa (who is very pregnant and does not need the stress of driving to my house).  As I assumed would happen- a traffic officer flagged me down and indicated for me to pull over.  I greet her warmly and offer her my driving license so she can confirm my stats.  The rest of the conversation goes something like this:

Officer: How is that tire??
Me: It is fine, thank you. (smile)
Officer:  I have no lunch today.
Me: Oh, I am very sorry.
Officer:  Where is my lunch?  You have my lunch for me?
Me: (realizing I packed boiled eggs to make salad for Vanessa and I) Yes!  Here you go, a cooked egg.  God bless you.
Officer: (smiles) Thank you, sister. You may go.
Me: Thank you. Good day.

Relief pours over me, as that could always go much worse than it did.  Caleb asks- "Why did you give that lady our food?".  And I reply, "Because we share our blessings."  She could have asked for a million different things- school fees, a bribe, my sunglasses, etc.  But she asked for lunch.  And I had food.  Isn't that just God's way?  If we're paying attention, He can use us to be a blessing. 

Who can you bless today?  What need lies in front of you that you can meet?

TIA: Monday Morning

During our time in Mbarara (and really the entire trip) there was a classic “this is Africa” moment. We had a meeting scheduled for Monday morning with someone helping with a ministry at Mbarara university. Right after breakfast as we were loading the truck we received word that the meeting was cancelled. TIA. We prayed that Jesus would open the door and provide some connections for us, since we had NOTHING else on our radar for that morning.

Billy Coppedge remembered seeing a “Scripture Union” sign as we were driving around the previous day and thought maybe we could just drop in and see what would become of an impromptu visit. Jesus was at work! We drove to the scripture union and pulled into their compound and immediately met a man named Richard. Richard was very welcoming even though he had never met us before. Billy explained why we were in Mbarara (exploring university ministries) and our current situation for the day (meeting fell through) and how we just wanted to stop in and see what they were doing. Richard explained to us that he was currently staying with a guy named Brian who works for FOCUS (Fellowship of Christian Union Society). FOCUS ministry is to disciple and train university students! God is so good! Richard gave Brian a call and they invited us to go to Brian’s and discuss each of our ministries and how we can partner together.

In America this situation probably would look a lot different, but here in Africa I find that the nationals are always more than willing to befriend you and Christians are always excited to talk about ministry opportunities. Only in Africa can a meeting be cancelled and then a new meeting spring up because we invited ourselves into a ministry we just happened to drive by. TIA!

TIA: "I love this country!"

I came home briefly on Friday and said to Kelly “I love this country!” In order to celebrate 4th of July the “right way” I felt the need to build a yard game for our BBQ. I decided “washers” was an appropriate and “easy” one to make even here in Uganda. So I began my journey for 2x4’s which is a lot more difficult than simply running to Home Depot or Lowes. I hopped in “wompus” (our Rav 4) and went to where I remember seeing some “timber” on the side of the road for sale. Indeed they had 2x4’s and the price was good enough for me- 7,000 a piece (shillings. not dollars. just under $3/piece) I only needed 2 and picked the two straightest pieces I could find. 

Then I went to put them in wompus. Problem! They wouldn’t fit by about 6 inches or so. Here in Uganda though there is always a way! My options were to either risk the safety of the numerous pedestrians and boda boda guys on the side of the road by letting the timber hang out the window or go borrow someone else’s car that is bigger. Neither option was I super excited about. However, a Ugandan man saw my troubles and approached me and said in broken English, “I have a bicycle. I deliver to you.” BRILLIANT! After explaining where I lived (knowing he didn’t understand me) he asked for 10,000 (again, shillings. Not dollars. roughly $4) and I was more than happy to pay. Another man translated for me where exactly I was and off my new friend John went with my 2 pieces of 2x4’s tied to his bike. 

Problem solved. I LOVE this country! -Josh

TIA: This Is A{merica}

Hallahans at the Rehearsal- including the bride-to-be, Leah!

We've been having a great time with family and friends here in Florida.  Thank you for carrying us in these overwhelmingly delightful days!  We've been struck with how similar and how different life in America is from when we left... and from our life in Uganda... Seth said last night "I'm tired of always getting in the car.  I just want to be home." 

Some happy America moments and some that made us shake our heads:

 crazy amounts of candy, junk food, and staggering options. 

 breakfast at the hotel buffet for $80+ or Dunkin Donuts for $11.  No question!

 Flavored apples???  Bubble Gum flavored apples, 100% Natural??? 

 Traffic lights.  Smooth, wide roads.  Just how many cars would be squeezed in here in Uganda? 

 Corn on the cob.  Happy, American summer food.

 Peaches.  I wish I could somehow bottle this scent and bring it with me. 

Wildlife in our yard.  An armadillo.  Running by our window.  Crazy!

It has been overwhelming.  Amazing.  Tiring.  and refreshing!  Can't wait to be back home in Uganda.  But this trip has been such a sweet memory making time!

TIA- Driver's Permits!

the many faces of Josh and Kelly...

So, we've been in Uganda now for a year, and our International Driver's Licenses are only good for a year.  We began the process at the end of April.  And we now have Ugandan Driver's Permits (ie: licenses)!  It was a long process, with much driving back and forth to their multiple locations, fees paid, photos taken, numerous copies of passports given, finger prints taken, eye exams done- but we are now proud to say we have our driver's licenses!

There was a bit of a time crunch, as Josh's New Jersey license expired soon... and he could only drive us in Florida (or here) with a Ugandan or New Jersey license.  The New Jersey license got lost in the mail (for months), but finally arrived this Monday... with 4 days to spare!  But we also have our Ugandan licenses so we're okay!  We're official and it feels good.  We belong here.  God is gracious.

Fresh. Delicious.

the joys of Uganda. 

fresh, tropical fruit. 

delicious vegetables.

every. day. of. the. year. 

ah, eternal summer. 

grateful. 

TIA: Diversion

"The symbol of the New Testament and the Christian Church is a cross, which stands for a love faithful despite physical agony and rejection by the world. No amount of air-conditioning and pew-cushioning in the suburban church can cover over the hard truth that the Christian life... is a narrow way of suffering; that discipleship is costly: that, for the faithful, there is always a cross to be carried. No one can understand Christianity to its depths who comes to it to enjoy it as a pleasant weekend diversion."  -W. Waldo Beach

TIA: One Year!

i think our palm tree has grown more than our boys have!

I cannot believe we've been in Uganda for one whole year.  Some days it feels like we just got here.  Other days it feels like this has always been home.  There have certainly been some incredible ministry opportunities (at Heritage and at United Faith Church), and some hilarious TIA moments.  I hope you've been enjoying this Thursday tradition! 

We love being on this journey with you- we certainly couldn't be here without you!  

We're celebrating this happy first anniversary by going on safari!  We got on the road this morning (will post soon: Road Trippin' Africa Style) and will return to Kampala Saturday.  Just a brief holiday to enjoy God's glorious creation and soak up some african sun.  

How has God changed you by being a part of His work here in Uganda??  We would love to hear from you in the comments section (and just maybe there will be a giveaway to celebrate our first year in Uganda)!

I think, one year in, we're becoming more compassionate as a family, and more grateful for all our blessings.  Our boys have certainly become more open to the things of God.  And, personally, I'm praying more than I ever have in my life.  What about you?  Leave your transformation story in the comments!